All I ever get is sad love.

Yesterday I broke my record of rock 'n roll stardom by playing guitar until my fingers actually bled.
It really happened, I swear, and I'm not even a leper. I just forgot the pick at home and I guess my middle finger wasn't expected to be scratched over and over by metallic strings, so it was his very own way of saying "enough!"

Then I broke my personal record of stupidity by losing my cellphone at the mall. Oh you dork.